Christmas Past 2009, 5

5. I remember this Christmas as it was so different to all the rest. No snow, no lights. It almost seemed as if there was no purpose. No snow, no lights. It almost seemed as if there was no purpose. The Christmas spirit had gone on Christmas Eve, the same day that my brother died.

People say things change, but why? Do they have to? Surely it's not natural, it's not right for people to die at Christmas. After all, it's the 'season to be jolly'. We tried so hard to recreate the usual Christmas lunch. My mother made the whole package; it seemed as if she had put more effort into it, just to make up for the loss. It was strange only to have four seats at the table, not five.

Sometimes I think of Scrooge and how much he hated Christmas, and how I feel about Christmas now. To me it's no longer the season of festive frolics. But it is a time of remembrance, and imagining what things could be like. After all, things do, change. Nothing is ever the same, and you have to adapt to change, whether you want to or not.